But what I have a problem with is grown men who see nothing wrong with scratching their balls or putting their hands down their trousers to “sort things out” and have a good old rummage while they’re sat right in front of me having a chat.
This week alone I have experienced this with two individuals who are over 30 and you think would know better.
One was in a work-based situation and happened more than once. We’d be having a conversation and he would just casually have a feel and a scratch on his man sandwich. The first time I let him off with it because we all get an itch here and there and the weather is a bit hot and sticky right now. After the fifth or sixth time (within a week) it has resulted in me being totally repulsed by this man. His mere presence anywhere near me now aggravates me to the point where I will fake a phone call so I can dart away from him. I know this may seem a trifle unfair but he is a grown man in a professional position. When talking to people, what rational reason could he give for having a feel and a good old play around with his balls as if he’s back at home reclining in the bath and having a lovely time? There is an infuriating arrogance in someone who gives such little consideration to others that he thinks they want to see him feeling himself up.
Perhaps there are ladettes and rugby girls who actually find it funny. Maybe even some girls disturbingly find it sexy. Maybe he’s been around them all his life and I’m just a repressed uptight bitch (I’m definitely not, piggy promise). I don’t know. Just thinking about it makes me gag.
Another incident was a friend who I was enjoying a drink with last week. We were sitting on some high bar stools and he was wearing funny, unflattering long shorts. He did it slightly more discreetly than the work guy but he kept giving them a nudge and a little tug every so often. Again, it really started to irritate me that he wouldn’t think this would be offensive to me. He’s my friend and I am in no way attracted to him so to be forced to notice this particular body part over the course of an evening really put me off my pork scratchings.
So, for future reference it would be really nice if men kept their itchy and scratchy business for the bathroom, bedroom or the STD clinic. Wherever you do it please just keep it away from me and my uptight, over sensitive eyes.